Moving Parks

Man! My media server crashed and it won’t boot!
It looks like I will be stuck here for another couple of hours until the darn server comes back up again. Why me!! and why now!!

Lunch time!
I have little bit of time to write down what’s in my mind before it fades away.
What I have to write might offend people but hey, it’s my blog and if you don’t like what I have to say? tough!
Through out my short but not too short life of past 26 years, I have never questioned the fact that I am a Christian. What makes me a Christian? When I was asked this years ago, I would simply return a blank look as if whoever that have asked the question ought to know just by looking at me. To me, being the follower of Christ was same as being born a Korean. It just was always that way.

Fast forward to today, and if anyone asks me what makes me a Christian, I can give multiple different answers. It no longer is a simple fact; well, it is but there are more to be said on the topic.
My most common start of a prayer is something like this. “Thank you father for everything that I am.” What does this mean? I truly, from the bottom of my heart believe that my life and all of my fortunes have been the work of God. I know, some of you may roll your eyes and say “not another one!” but I must confess that I am glad to announce that I am who I am because my heavenly father have carried out his plans in his time.

“in his time” is the concept that have changed me over the years. In the past, in my childish ways, I have asked for thing I wanted or needed. I would get cranky and kept on asking for it to my parents and to God. As I matured, what I have discovered is that not everything I think I needed was really a necessity. My life is the testament to God’s existence and power. Everything in my life has fallen into place just at the right time and with the perfect amount. Whenever I do become full of myself and start to believe in my abilities too much, everything will just disappear but once I realize that it wasn’t my doing but rather God’s plan, everything I have lost and more will be given back to me. Everything in my life is my testament.

So, do you still wanna ask me why I’m a Christian? Then please do ask and I will be full of joy to share this peace in my heart with you.

Why do I pride myself for being unusual? Why is being eccentric give me a joy? I guess I strive for the individuality that comes with being eccentric. It doesn’t mean I’m interesting but at least I stand out. Now, the natural question is ‘does this uniqueness give me anything?’ I know I tend to come across with a little bit of weirdness but does it actually help me in any way? Some thing for me to ponder for next while.

Anyway, working on the Easter Monday is no fun!

I don’t even know when I fell asleep. I woke up because Toby was barking like crazy. I don’t know what he was barking about but he’s a pretty good alarm clock at least.

It is Sunday and I’m nowhere near finishing. I will need to work all day today after church to get this thing done. Hopefully I will be free next weekend.

Time is a very strange thing. I guess I have matured over the years to accept certain things life throws at me. I really wonder what has happen to me. My life isn’t what I pictured it would be. So.. I took the test on www.realage.com. According to it, my real age is 29!! damn!

Among the recommendations, I should have more close friends. hmmm..
I need someone who can put up with my inner geek. Don’t have to understand it but just accept it. I’m constantly trying to improve myself but I think I need to find a way to market myself better. No one really knows me. no one really takes advantage of all the things I can offer both professionally and personally.

I begin to wonder, is this all there is to life? There has to be something more. It can’t be just this. Is the notion of endless joy just a fantasy? Can’t I wake up majority of the mornings with an excitement for what the life has to offer that day? There must be some happiness I can achieve where I can truely say without any hesitation that I am happy beyond any doubt. Now, is that so hard?

They say we have the ability to trigger memories with smell. I didn’t really believe it until it hit me today. Just out of the blue, familiar smell triggered happy memories. Memories of yesteryears, memories of fulfillment.

Memory is a funny thing. It can be lost and be found without any effort on my part. Without any significant event, it comes back to make me laugh and smile and remember.

Here is a start to a beautiful Saturday.
Too bad I will be stuck inside in front of my computer. I wonder how long I will be able to sustain this productivity level. I guess I will have to find out.